It's a bit basic, and the grammar could use some work, but as the description says, it's unfinished, so i wouldn't worry too much about that.
otherwise, a pretty good story for something that's unfinished (and your first game).
not too much of a fan of the required long hallway with enemy encounters, but again, it's unfinished. there probably would've been something along the way had it been finished.
plus, an arena thingy for when you've gotten all the content out of the way (minus the arena).